Where Professional and Personal Meet

After choosing to work with secondary students in America, my professors made a point to emphasize the boundaries of the student/teacher relationship. I was told repeatedly that I was to be friendly to students, but to never be their friend. The relationship my students and I would have would be supportive, nurturing at times, but above all professional. As I began to mentor the young men of the bridge builders program and as I student taught seniors, I always kept this advice in the back of my mind. However, as I get deeper and deeper into my teaching experience here in Korea I am finding that I must unlearn many of the things which were emphasized at university.

In Korea, the student/teacher relationship is complex; it is both professional and personal. While it is the teacher’s job to educate and scaffold student learning, it is also the teacher’s duty, and role in the relationship, to lead by example both in and out of the classroom. It is not uncommon for a Korean teacher to meet up with her students outside of school and join them for family meals or a recreational stroll. This past weekend Eric and I were able to experience these new-found boundaries first hand. At the end of last week, two of Eric’s third graders (9th grade in the US), Hyon Bom and Eun Jun, invited us to hike Mudeung Mountain with them. I must admit, I was a little apprehensive at first, but the desire to be shown a new area of town quickly trumped this feeling.

We met the two boys at the school yard and from there they took over, calling us a taxi and getting us to our destination effortlessly. A welcomed change since cab rides has proved to be a language challenge in the past. Once at the mountain, the boys began to explain how often they go hiking, the physical challenges which lay ahead, and began to inquire about our American life. However, the boys made sure to address us with the respect our age warranted us in Korean culture and were mindful to address us as “teacher” despite our requesting otherwise. Both boys were eager to practice their English as well as share with us some information about themselves. The duration of our hike was passed by listening to American pop music, building vocabulary and learning what it means to be a teenager in South Korea. Lastly, what gave the day an added twist was the boys funded our taxi trips to and from the mountain. Eric and I immediately offered to pay for it all, but our insistence was rejected. While this unconventional by US standards, it was a special honor for Eric’s students to be able to treat us to this experience. However, we could not let this good deed go unnoticed so Eric and I treated the boys to dinner before getting them home.

Korean culture has the highest hopes for the relationships of its citizens. Rather than scrutinize or judge the different relationships which emerge in the society, Koreans choose to see things for what they are; making a point to avoid searching for what relationships could be, either good or bad. This is a degree of levelheadedness I think I could get used to.